Friday, March 7, 2014

Drunk Husband

A man gets into a big argument with his wife so he decides to head up to the local pub and drink a few pints while she cools off. He runs into a few friends and they start celebrating and talking about the good ole’ days. Several hours quickly pass and he decides its getting late and he better start heading home.

He goes to get off the bar stool to leave and falls flat on his face. He makes several attempts to get up but cant seem to get on his feet. He thinks to himself that he must’ve really over done it this time to be so drunk he cant even stand. He looks around and luckily no one has noticed his drunken display so he crawls out of the bar where he still cant seem to pull himself together. He figures the hell with it, its only a few blocks to his house so he just crawls home and gently slides into bed as not to disturb his sleeping wife.

The next morning he awakes with this feeling of piercing eyes upon him when he notices his wife standing at the foot of the bed with her arms crossed and obviously upset. He mutters out a “Good morning, honey” to which she angrily replies “You were out at the pub all night getting drunk, weren’t you?”

He quickly rolls over and begins to plead with her, “Of course not honey, I wouldn’t do that. I was here in bed with you most of night. Why in the world would you say that?”

She rolls her eyes and replies, “Because the pub called, you forgot your wheelchair…Again!”